If we talk about relationship as for my lovelife!. I've been so much in it. Its a tragic, traumatic experience and where I committed __ic__e once but still God never leaves me. I keep searching and searching. Loving and hurting. But I know its not the end of finding her, the one whose really meant for me. Special thanks to Acel Van Omen!
As “singles”, most of you are longing to be in a relationship.. To love and to be loved.. to find the right man/woman and be with him/her for the rest of your life. God definitely understands our emotions and desires, He is even the one who instituted marriage; but before we enter into an exclusive relationship, there are things that we need to consider. These are some Biblical boundary lines when it comes to entering a relationship.
In the beginning, when God created Adam and Eve, he told them that they are FREE to eat from any tree in the garden BUT they must not eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Here, we can see that freedom comes with responsibility. God told them not to eat from that tree to protect them. It’s like a baby playing around the house. They can play or do whatever they want, but as a parent, you of course will teach/tell them NOT to put their fingers in the electric fan or electrical socket because you’re looking out for them. It’s the same way with God. He has set boundaries for our own good.
Below are some things to consider in entering a guy-girl exclusive relationship.
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In the beginning, when God created Adam and Eve, he told them that they are FREE to eat from any tree in the garden BUT they must not eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Here, we can see that freedom comes with responsibility. God told them not to eat from that tree to protect them. It’s like a baby playing around the house. They can play or do whatever they want, but as a parent, you of course will teach/tell them NOT to put their fingers in the electric fan or electrical socket because you’re looking out for them. It’s the same way with God. He has set boundaries for our own good.
Below are some things to consider in entering a guy-girl exclusive relationship.
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1. GODLY DEVOTION
Matthew 22:37-38 “ Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment.”
• The first thing you should be looking for in a partner is if he/she has UNDIVIDED devotion to God. Anything that is above your relationship with God is an IDOL. So, if you’re the first in that person’s life.. have nothing to do with them. Unless he loves God more than you, don’t have anything to do with them.
• So, are you his/her first love? Or God?
Matthew 22:37-38 “ Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment.”
• The first thing you should be looking for in a partner is if he/she has UNDIVIDED devotion to God. Anything that is above your relationship with God is an IDOL. So, if you’re the first in that person’s life.. have nothing to do with them. Unless he loves God more than you, don’t have anything to do with them.
• So, are you his/her first love? Or God?
2. GODLY PURPOSE
Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in a man’s heart but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”
• Before getting into a relationship, you and that person should find out what God’s purpose is in your lives. You and the other person should have a direction and a vision. Now, who would want to be with someone without direction or passion? Even before Eve was brought to Adam, God gave Adam a task/ work to do.
3. GODLY STANDARDS (PURITY AND HOLINESS)
Leviticus 20:7-8 “ Consecrate yourselves and be holy, because I am the Lord your God. Keep my decrees and follow them. I am the Lord, who makes you holy.”
Eph.1:4 “ For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight.”
• How does the guy treat you? Like a sister or otherwise?
• I’ve witnessed a couple who loves God who waited till their wedding for their first kiss. My friend Elizabeth and her husband respected each other and honored God. They want to mean the white dress in front of friends of family. To really enjoy the sacrifice and wait during their honeymoon.
• Ladies, if a guy tells you “If you really love me, then we should do it”…punch him or kick his balls to hell! haha!
• There should be NO HINT OF SEXUAL IMMORALITY.
“ But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.”- Ephesians 5:3
“For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person such a man is an idolater has nay inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient. Therefore do not be partners with them”-
Ephesians 5:6-7
“ It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen who do not know God, and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy spirit.” – 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8
4. GODLY COUNSEL
Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in a man’s heart but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”
• Before getting into a relationship, you and that person should find out what God’s purpose is in your lives. You and the other person should have a direction and a vision. Now, who would want to be with someone without direction or passion? Even before Eve was brought to Adam, God gave Adam a task/ work to do.
3. GODLY STANDARDS (PURITY AND HOLINESS)
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Leviticus 20:7-8 “ Consecrate yourselves and be holy, because I am the Lord your God. Keep my decrees and follow them. I am the Lord, who makes you holy.”
Eph.1:4 “ For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight.”
• How does the guy treat you? Like a sister or otherwise?
• I’ve witnessed a couple who loves God who waited till their wedding for their first kiss. My friend Elizabeth and her husband respected each other and honored God. They want to mean the white dress in front of friends of family. To really enjoy the sacrifice and wait during their honeymoon.
• Ladies, if a guy tells you “If you really love me, then we should do it”…punch him or kick his balls to hell! haha!
• There should be NO HINT OF SEXUAL IMMORALITY.
“ But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.”- Ephesians 5:3
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“For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person such a man is an idolater has nay inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient. Therefore do not be partners with them”-
Ephesians 5:6-7
“ It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen who do not know God, and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy spirit.” – 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8
4. GODLY COUNSEL
Psalm 1:1-3 “ Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prosper.”
• Do not listen to those who are not walking in God, they’ll just get you in trouble.
Example:
Girl 1: But I love him, I can’t live without him even if he’s married
Girl 2: If you’re happy, then go for it. Fight for love
….duh?!?
Be accountable to someone who would encourage you and lead you accordingly, not those who doesn’t care with what God thinks.
Proverbs 18:22 “ He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.”
• Guys should do the finding.. That’s our role..
• Do not listen to those who are not walking in God, they’ll just get you in trouble.
Example:
Girl 1: But I love him, I can’t live without him even if he’s married
Girl 2: If you’re happy, then go for it. Fight for love
….duh?!?
Be accountable to someone who would encourage you and lead you accordingly, not those who doesn’t care with what God thinks.
Proverbs 18:22 “ He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.”
• Guys should do the finding.. That’s our role..
• Women should WAIT.. It didn’t say “she who finds a husband…” The men should stand up and not just wait for the woman to just fall from heaven. Women shouldn’t go flirting. 
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• No guy has the right to say to any girl “I love you” until he is prepared to say in his next breath- “Will you marry me?” If you can’t make the second statement, don’t bother making the first. It isn’t true.
Enjoy life, enjoy being single(not all the time).. Meet people (haha! like my friend Rommel Fermo), but under these boundaries and you will be blessed. If you’ve found someone, pray for that someone.. Ask for Godly counsel. That person will not tell you who you should marry, but they’re there to guide you and give you wisdom.
I hope you've learn something.
Special thanks to Acel Van Omen!
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